Got any good jokes?

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Impenitent
Posts: 5774
Joined: Wed Feb 10, 2010 2:04 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Impenitent »

My apathy is at an all time whatever...

-Imp
Gary Childress
Posts: 11748
Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2011 3:08 pm
Location: It's my fault

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Gary Childress »

Impenitent wrote: Fri Jul 11, 2025 1:27 pm My apathy is at an all time whatever...

-Imp
That's funny.
Walker
Posts: 16383
Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2015 12:00 am

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Walker »

Here’s something to frame for posterity.

:lol:

https://img.patriotpost.us/01JZX6V56DDX ... dpr=2&q=50
Walker
Posts: 16383
Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2015 12:00 am

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Walker »

You shoulda sent the damn thing three days sooner.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_9WN_9D2nY


It is interesting that when angry, folks often refer to themselves and to loved ones as, "God-damned."

That's strange, because the self that you talk to hears that, and that self takes what you say literally, especially with repetition.

*

That woman deserves a medal for turning rage into spontaneous eloquence.
"Nowww!" with a growl.

:lol:
Impenitent
Posts: 5774
Joined: Wed Feb 10, 2010 2:04 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Impenitent »

do beginning pianists in China learn to play knife and fork?

-Imp
promethean75
Posts: 7113
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2018 10:29 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by promethean75 »

Don't f*ckin' lie, Imp. You didn't make that up... you saw it somewhere.
Impenitent
Posts: 5774
Joined: Wed Feb 10, 2010 2:04 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Impenitent »

Where do bad rainbows go?

To Prism. It's a light sentence, but it gives them time to refract.

-Imp
promethean75
Posts: 7113
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2018 10:29 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by promethean75 »

When asking grandma to keep an eye on the carving knife when the grandkids are in the kitchen goes wrong and you wish you were a little more clear...

https://kaotic.com/video/801cfff3_20250908005125_t
User avatar
accelafine
Posts: 5042
Joined: Sat Nov 04, 2023 10:16 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by accelafine »

In case anyone isn't aware that 'promethean' is a sick little fucker, just read this before clicking on the little sicko's links.

''Gore and violence: Kaotic was known for sharing videos and images of graphic violence, fatal accidents, suicide, and murder. This category of material, known as "gore media," often depicts horrific events without filters or censorship.''
promethean75
Posts: 7113
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2018 10:29 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by promethean75 »

"Link"? Bro, that's what happens when you click on the erf. Try leaving your living room once in a while. You'll see.

You should thank you're lucky stars the good people of Kaotic.com are providing that site for us. When was the last time you saw someone try to put a lawnmower up their butt or their eyes pop out from the point blank force of a shotgun blast to the head?
promethean75
Posts: 7113
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2018 10:29 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by promethean75 »

Relax mate it's just anarchist theater for marxist propaganda purposes. We're basically saying to the people of the world "it's 2025 and stuff like this is still happening on your planet? Maybe you're doing something wrong, then?"
promethean75
Posts: 7113
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2018 10:29 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by promethean75 »

What do you tell the pastor when you go to his church cookout and find out he's making turkey burgers like he did last time and the time before that?

There is nothing new under the bun.
promethean75
Posts: 7113
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2018 10:29 pm

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by promethean75 »

The hearse arrives, and the driver enters the funeral home. The mortician has just completed prepping Kirk's body for the funeral service as the driver enters, looking at a map confused. He lays the map on the table, thinking the mortician is looking at it over his shoulder and points to a faded spot on it, asking, "is that Dunkirk?" The mortician, who's paying no attention to the map as he casually cleans the last of his implements, thinks the driver is asking about the corpse and so replies "yup, he's done and ready to go". The driver says thanks, loads the casket into the hearse, and begins his long drive to the wrong fucking city.
Walker
Posts: 16383
Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2015 12:00 am

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Walker »

Lighten up, Hakeem.
It’s a joke.

https://twitter.com/i/status/1973511326438924661
Fairy
Posts: 3751
Joined: Thu May 09, 2024 7:07 pm
Location: The United Kingdom of Heaven

Re: Got any good jokes?

Post by Fairy »

A true story ▶️ Last night I slept like a log.
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