I've sprung a leak

[Maia]

I was informed by the local water company on Saturday that there's a leak somewhere on my side of the street, but they don't know where, exactly, and that it's either mine, or my landlord's, responsibility to get it fixed. I phoned them up first thing on Monday and had a rather lengthy discussion with one of their representatives. She asked me, first of all, to go out into my back garden to check if there was any water accumulating anywhere, which was definitely fun, if a little messy, but I was unable to locate any excess water, other than that caused by the fact that it was raining. She then informed me that according to law, I, or my landlord, am supposed to hire a plumber, and if I don't, they'll serve an enforcement order and send their own people round, at greater cost, which will be shared be all households downstream, as it were, from the leak. I asked if I would still be liable if I paid for a plumber, but one of the other households didn't, and she said yes, so I suggested, not unreasonably I feel, that there was no point, therefore, in hiring one, to which she had no response.

So basically, at some unknown date in the near future they'll presumably be sending some workmen round to traipse through my flat in their muddy boots, to dig my back garden up, and they won't even guarantee to put it back how they found it.

[attofishpi]

..so, may as well make the most of a bad situation.

Plant some leeks and other vegetables in the newly dug up garden.

[Maia]

..so, may as well make the most of a bad situation.

Plant some leeks and other vegetables in the newly dug up garden.

It's more of a forest, than a garden, as such.

[promethean75]

Bloody hell, Maia, you scared the bullocks out of me. I thought your eyes popped out, and you were bleeding to death, or your canoe was going down somewhere in the English channel.

Next time, title the thread "plumbing issues" please. Thanks in advance.

[accelafine]

Bloody hell, Maia, you scared the bullocks out of me. I thought your eyes popped out, and you were bleeding to death, or your canoe was going down somewhere in the English channel.

Next time, title the thread "plumbing issues" please. Thanks in advance.

I thought you wanted her to take 'a long walk off a short ramp'. Why would you care if she sank in the English channel?

[promethean75]

A 'pier', not a ramp. And i said that because i knew Maia would land in her canoe when she fell off the end of the pier.

Do i really have to explain all this? I thought it was obvious.

[Maia]

Bloody hell, Maia, you scared the bullocks out of me. I thought your eyes popped out, and you were bleeding to death, or your canoe was going down somewhere in the English channel.

Next time, title the thread "plumbing issues" please. Thanks in advance.

My eyes definitely popped out when they said I might be liable to pay for it.

[Impenitent]

as long as you're not exposed to the plumber's crack...

then again...

-Imp

ps Mario is my favorite plumber

[LuckyR]

Bloody hell, Maia, you scared the bullocks out of me. I thought your eyes popped out, and you were bleeding to death, or your canoe was going down somewhere in the English channel.

Next time, title the thread "plumbing issues" please. Thanks in advance.

My eyes definitely popped out when they said I might be liable to pay for it.

Why would you suppose a renter would be responsible for building maintainance?

[Maia]

Bloody hell, Maia, you scared the bullocks out of me. I thought your eyes popped out, and you were bleeding to death, or your canoe was going down somewhere in the English channel.

Next time, title the thread "plumbing issues" please. Thanks in advance.

My eyes definitely popped out when they said I might be liable to pay for it.

Why would you suppose a renter would be responsible for building maintainance?

I wasn't sure, till I checked.

[Maia]

The leak is probably from a pipe sticking out of my neighbour's front wall. The neighbour on the other side told me about it yesterday. This is good news because the neighbour with the pipe is "downstream" of me.

[attofishpi]

You're funny Maia!

Bung some "no more leaks" into it.

[Maia]

This morning, just after I'd come out of the shower, there was an insistent rapping at my front door. Dressed in just a large towel, I opened the window in my living room and shouted out, asking what all the fuss was about. The guy who answered said he was here to fix the leak in my neighbour's house, but was letting me know that he was just about to turn the water off for our side of the road. If he had been five minutes earlier I'd still have been in the middle of my shower, so that was lucky. I asked if he was from Severn Trent, that is, the water company, but he said no, he was from the city council, since the house on that side is still a council house. Anyway, I went out to the shops, as usual, and when I got back, the same guy came up to me as I was unlocking my front door and told me that they hadn't found a leak in my neighbours house, so weren't sure where it was. Which basically means that we're back to square one. They couldn't check mine as it's not a council house any more. And talking of the city council, I was actually quite surprised that they'd sent somebody out at all, since they can't even collect people's rubbish any more. The dustmen have been on strike for weeks and rubbish is piling up in the streets everywhere, stinking the place up.

[promethean75]

"This morning, just after I'd come out of the shower, there was an insistent rapping at my front door. Dressed in just a large towel..."

After a brief but suspenseful reading of that opening paragraph, I suddenly lost interest and realized, "Oh, this post is about the water leak again. Dammit"

[Maia]

"This morning, just after I'd come out of the shower, there was an insistent rapping at my front door. Dressed in just a large towel..."

After a brief but suspenseful reading of that opening paragraph, I suddenly lost interest and realized, "Oh, this post is about the water leak again. Dammit"

It's always a good idea to lure the reader in with a compelling opening line, full of promise and anticipation.