Maybe you're right. Most people I see on here seem to post relatively frequently and regularly, at least for whatever stretches of time until they disappear, sometimes returning a while later. Probably most "well-balanced" people are out more--doing productive things, work, hobbies, or social things, travel, activities, events, or self-care, exercise, study, meditation, etc.
And then there are those like me who do little if anything other than fiddle around on the computer mostly when I'm out of work. I guess in the end, I'm just superfluous to the universe. And if anyone is most superfluous to the universe, then maybe it's me. But to be honest, if there's something that needs to be done and that I can do or that I should be doing any more than anything else, then I don't know what it is or how to do it. But I'm sure AJ has no shortage of things he could suggest to me, if for no other reason than sparing me from his ridicule.
I guess he's right though. I've gotten to the point where nothing will move me or make me budge. I've built my last fortress and now I can only stand on it and hope someone else stronger doesn't come along and take it from me before I have a chance to pass from this world in a more peaceful way. Or maybe if I want to take away the "combat" part, I've settled in my death bed (little more than the nest I was born in) and now simply wait for whatever happens to happen when it happens. Maybe I should have been like the little pig who constructed his house out of brick instead of straw? Now I know how St. Thomas Aquinas must have felt when he had that last revelation of his.
Retreat becomes a bad habit when one spends most of one's life surrounded by what one perceives as 'evil'. But maybe that just means I'm 'evil'? Perhaps If I throw myself into a volcano that would solve the "problem of evil?"
Maybe the Mafia aren't such bad people after all, at least not much worse than many other seemingly ordinary "law-abiding" citizens?
Perhaps Bette Midler will write a song about me too? For what good reason or result could be derived from such a song, I will never be able to fathom.