Lacewing wrote: ↑Wed Jan 22, 2020 2:59 am
RCSaunders wrote: ↑Wed Jan 22, 2020 2:07 am
feelings are not under our direct conscious control.
So you don't think it's possible to encounter a situation and ask oneself, do I want to feel "this way" or "this way" about/within this situation?
You can certainly ask yourself if you want to feel a certain way, which is a good idea if what you are feeling indicates something is wrong or if you do not understand why you are feeling as you do. That is often a first step in discovering why you are having feelings you do not like.
Lacewing wrote: ↑Wed Jan 22, 2020 2:59 am
I can see how thinking and feeling are tied together -- but it appears to me that I have a choice about how I want to feel. It's like energy. If something unpleasant happens, I may initially feel bad or sad...but I don't want to stay in that, so I shift out of it. I still deal with the situation (so I'm not denying it), and I don't have to like it, but I might choose to feel calm and balanced instead. Or sometimes, in bad situations, I'll choose to laugh instead of cry. It's choosing one kind of energy over another. And it's my understanding that our bodies respond to what we feel more than what we think.
First, it is not our bodie's response to feeling. Our emotional feelings are our bodie's response to whatever we are conscious of, especially what we believe and think. Secondly, since the emotions are an automatic response of our physiology to consciousness, we cannot just decide to have a different feeling.
We can choose to think differently, however, and in that indirect way we can control our emotions. The whole problem with discussing feelings is that they are not simple and most people have no idea what they are or why we have them.
I gave you a link in my previous comment that explains what emotions are and a bit of how they work. This article, "
Feelings," is a bit simpler, if you are interested. It is going to be possible to discuss how to control emotions if one does not really know what they are.
If you are really interested in what the emotions are and how have a fulfilling and satisfying emotional life, you might be interested in my 2004, somewhat more technical treatment of the subject, "
Feelings—Introduction to the Nature of Emotions."