No. We have no control over reality, and it's bad to deal with emotions directly, and not with facts. I'm implying that "being sad" is something that can't be stopped, but being wrong, can.Greta wrote:You are implying that we have no mental or emotional control. Never should we come to a deeper understanding of the nature of our mistakes.TSBU wrote:I tried to put a sentimental answer to show how ridiculous is trying to make regret disappear.
No, according to me, maturity is a joke, but come to see something from big to small, is a lesson. But you are puting that lesson as a rule: you feel regrets? then most of times, you are giving too much attention. And that's wrong. Beh, not more autohlep crap, strawwoman, first of all, I started this cause hobbes was blaming a person he doesn't knows, because he feels regrets.Greta wrote: According to you there is no growth nor the means to contextualise coming with maturity. No chance to put relatively small things that seemed huge in the heat of the moment into proportion. No gaining of wisdom. No, just more dead children strawmen.
Forgive is escape. I don't forgive, I just remember, and I give things importance, if you forgot the keys one day, thats a fact for your whole life, but that's not important, and of course, you can improve yourself and be the one who forget less things. That's not "forgiving" that's just rational judging. You are listening what you want to listen. And talking to yourself. Like hobbes. Nobody cares here about your haircut, greta, or about mine, I don't use fallacies, if I'm wrong, I'm wrong, you are the one who start with exagerations when someone wants to eat a fucking hamburguer, if I talk to you, I talk to you, and, most of times, with no hope, believe it or not, I try to make you understand something (not to put something in your head, not to be the one who is right). And it's boring enough.Greta wrote:No one's talked about escaping emotions but you. Once the lesson is learned and you've emoted sufficiently then I think it is neither psychopathic nor inhuman to forgive your young self and move on.TSBU wrote:Escaping emotions is bad. And, of course, leting go, as a rule, is escapism. If you lose your keys, and you escape, you'll keep losing them.
You are completely wrong about this. Nobody wants to suffer. They may want to CHANGE. This is futile... all that things you say, we use that words, as a simplification, for complex process: Do you know a single person who say about himself in the present that he is lying to himself, truly and conpletely believeing that? not, because that's impossible. They are wrong, and yes, people can have a mess in their minds, like masoquists, addicts, etc. But not a single person wahts to suffer "complete, alone, suffer", and to think otherwise is nasty. Social pressure is a fucking simplification too. If you don't fit in what people demands, but you want something from them, the problem is not "social pressure", the problem is what you want from other people. "Oh, that girl hates his body, she is anorexic, social pressure", no, no "social pressure", she wants to have what she think that she would have being more pretty. And she may be wrong about her body, she sure is giving a lot of importance to that, but that not change that the thing that cause anguish to her is not "social pressure", is what she wants. Now say that being intelligent, pretty, whatever, doesn't give some things that, eveidently, you can't have without that capacitys. Now go telling a man with no job because he has no brain, that his hunger is "social pressure".Greta wrote:People often engage in self-flagellation. There's great peer pressure to be a good team player, so to speak. We internalise the society's values - focused on society, not you - and then react accord to that "programming".People certainly can wallow. They can be self indulgent. Masochistic tendencies. Guilt. Self hatred. All very common. That's the kind of damage caused by social pressure.TSBU wrote:People NEVER hurt themselves because they like to do it ...
Inadequate? Inadequate for what? Everybody is inadequate, me too, for perfection, this is a mess (a fucking enormous mess), and we must try to be better. If someone is "ok" with this world, if someone doesn't judge evil and good people, if one person doesn't try to change things, I don't like that person.Greta wrote: That's why it's happiness-promoting IMO to regularly step back from other humans for a while to be grounded in actual reality - nature and the cosmos - as a respite from abstracted mess of human relations and the constant attempts of people to make one feel inadequate (noting that citizens who feel inadequate try harder).
As I said, don't put us at your level. Guilty is about wrong or right, if you truly decline it, stop saying what is good or bad. Look at hobbes, he ended insulting everyone,just because they feel regret, well, I don't feel regret when I say that a thief is worse... if you don't feel regret with being out of "guilty game", in my eyes, you've let go your soul.Greta wrote: I recognise the efficacy of the Guilt Game, but these days I decline to consciously participate.
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