Admiration issues.

[duszek]

It seems to me that many men are resentful against women because they do not feel admired by them as they think they should be.

Is there a solution to this problem ?
What if they got admiration from a pet like from a dog ? A female dog particularly.

[Jaded Sage]

This can be tough to overcome. I wouldn't've been able to do it so constantly if I hadn't had a girlfriend at one point who was a solid 9. I'm like a 7 on a good day. There is sanity in recognizing that many girls in our culture are not sound judges of men. They are ruled largely by instinct rather than reason. When one finds one's judge to be unfit, the judgement weighs less heavily. However, for those of us who can't move to another culture, particularly the asian cultures (See: Seven Years in Tibet), the constantness of our failures and the successes of others can be quite an obstacle. When you realize and take to heart the fact that only the judgement of a single girl matters, the burden is completely lifted whenever the issue is not right in front of you.

[Walker]

A generation of male and female U.S. Baby Boomers were raised on this theme.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-wUe5aEwHM

Any other comparable propagandizing themes directed at impressionable minds, from other countries?

[duszek]

JS:

Why does judgement of other people matter that much in the first place ?

Could we not become independent of it somehow and thus feel more free and more balanced ?

[Dalek Prime]

This is about self-esteem issues for all of us. Not just one sex. And it's a part of human nature, that the individual needs to deal with. It's not for others to solve for them. Hence the 'self' part.

[Jaded Sage]

JS:

Why does judgement of other people matter that much in the first place ?

Could we not become independent of it somehow and thus feel more free and more balanced ?

I suppose there is a part of human nature (or a part of many cultures) that is inherently authoritarian.

Yes, we can become independent of it. I know it from experience. The trouble is that it can be a bit rude to bring up such things. Go figure. lol

[duszek]

It can be rude to bring up what things ?
I don´t quite follow you.

What is authoritarian ?

We can find some kind of authority approving of almost any kind of conduct.

Can´t we be our own authority ?
We are all created in God´s image says the Bible.

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Getting admiration from the "wrong" kind of people can make us angry sometimes ...

Admiration is not an absolutely desirable aim.

[Harbal]

What if they got admiration from a pet like from a dog ? A female dog particularly.

Dog's certainly seem to be capable of affection but I'm not sure about admiration. How do you imagine a dog would express it's admiration?

[duszek]

Yes, you are right, we cannot be sure.

I just thought that dogs might be impressed by our actions. We provide food for them etc. So they are eager to obey and to follow.

Is obedience not a sign of admiration ?

[Harbal]

I just thought that dogs might be impressed by our actions

Having never been complimented on my actions by a dog, I have no way of knowing if I have ever been admired by one.

Is obedience not a sign of admiration ?

I would probably obey someone who threatened to beat me to a pulp if I disobeyed him but I wouldn't necessarily admire him.

[duszek]

Is beating a dog usual nowadays in Yorkshire ????

I thought that the English loved cats and dogs even more than the rest of the world.

In the film Wallace and Gromit the dog was a smart fellow who was helpful. This film (probably an English one, but I am not sure) is an expression of treating pets well and with respect.

When dealing with a dog I feel like a great and wonderful person. Perhaps it is an illusion.

[vegetariantaxidermy]

This can be tough to overcome. I wouldn't've been able to do it so constantly if I hadn't had a girlfriend at one point who was a solid 9. I'm like a 7 on a good day. There is sanity in recognizing that many girls in our culture are not sound judges of men. They are ruled largely by instinct rather than reason. When one finds one's judge to be unfit, the judgement weighs less heavily. However, for those of us who can't move to another culture, particularly the asian cultures (See: Seven Years in Tibet), the constantness of our failures and the successes of others can be quite an obstacle. When you realize and take to heart the fact that only the judgement of a single girl matters, the burden is completely lifted whenever the issue is not right in front of you.

Only the yanks would come up with a 'system' as nasty as 'grading' women from one to ten. Horrible people.

[Jaded Sage]

I don't judge their worth based on it. It's foolish to deny that some people are more attractive than others. It's possible to do it with respect and maturity.

[vegetariantaxidermy]

I don't judge their worth based on it. It's foolish to deny that some people are more attractive than others. It's possible to do it with respect and maturity.

You just used the offensive 1-10 'method'. That's one bit of American 'culture' that thankfully hasn't caught on here. Young girls have enough self esteem problems without misogynistic pricks 'rating' them a '2' or a '3'. And attractiveness is a lot more complex than that. Not that shallow Americans would understand. Look at your plastic Hollywood clones.

[Jaded Sage]

It's only offensive if offense is taken. In her case, she'd be flattered. In you I see hypocrisy, rudeness, self-righteousness, and presumptuousness. It's more productive to work on your own faults than it is to point out pretend faults in others.