Is marriage a selfish relationship?

[Philosophy Explorer]

For example, it used to be a man could have a harem (I haven't checked up on the MidEast recently).

In Western civilization, a marriage legally exists between a couple. So you couldn't have two men and a woman or two women and a man, etc. (otherwise you'd end up on Jerry Springer). So these one-on-one relationships I say is due to selfishness as the partners are unwilling to share their mates with anyone else. Do you agree?

PhilX

[duszek]

From the perspective of the man who provides for the off-spring it may be important to know that the kids are actually all his and not his neighbour´s.

In the animal world males also take care that the off-spring are their and not a coocoo´s.

From the point of view of the woman it is important that the man brings all the resources home for the benefit of her and her children and does not spend it on some other women outside and thus endagers her and her children´s survival.

This is an economic perspective which used to be the predominant once when most people needed to struggle to survive.

[FlashDangerpants]

So these one-on-one relationships I say is due to selfishness as the partners are unwilling to share their mates with anyone else.

Is this a specialist non-pejorative use of the concept selfish, or are you arguing that marriage is selfish and that selfishness entails lack of virtue?

[Philosophy Explorer]

So these one-on-one relationships I say is due to selfishness as the partners are unwilling to share their mates with anyone else.

Is this a specialist non-pejorative use of the concept selfish, or are you arguing that marriage is selfish and that selfishness entails lack of virtue?

I'm saying that all marriage is selfish.

PhilX

[FlashDangerpants]

That was already made obvious by you saying it in your first post.

Are you saying that marriage is non-judgementally defined as a form of selfishness ('selfish like a gene')
Or are you arguing that because marriage is selfish it is also wrong ('selfish like easting all the cookies')?

[Philosophy Explorer]

That was already made obvious by you saying it in your first post.

Are you saying that marriage is non-judgementally defined as a form of selfishness ('selfish like a gene')
Or are you arguing that because marriage is selfish it is also wrong ('selfish like easting all the cookies')?

The first one.

PhilX

[Skip]

Of course it is. So is every other social arrangement, though most arrangements do not distribute their costs and benefits equally between/among the individuals they include.
Humans are selfish. So is every other entity with enough brain-cells to identify as a "self".

[Philosophy Explorer]

Of course it is. So is every other social arrangement, though most arrangements do not distribute their costs and benefits equally between/among the individuals they include.
Humans are selfish. So is every other entity with enough brain-cells to identify as a "self".

We know it is Skip, but there are people who would disagree. Let's see what develops.

PhilX

[Jaded Sage]

What of the idea of faithfulness?

[Skip]

That's selfish, too. Withholding your precious body from the great mass of femaledom, saving its benefices for one favoured woman.
The only thing more selfish is holy orders.

[duszek]

Can a marriage be altruistic ? (= not selfish)

I marry someone for the sake of this person alone and not for my own sake.
Is it at all conceivable ?

[Philosophy Explorer]

Can a marriage be altruistic ? (= not selfish)

I marry someone for the sake of this person alone and not for my own sake.
Is it at all conceivable ?

Hi Duszek,

My philosophy is that everything we do is motivated by selfishness to an extent. Even doing things for the other person can be interpreted as being selfish (for example you're looking for certain feedback to see if your efforts are worthwhile). And if you're doing something for this person without expecting something in return, the question would be why? (why this person and not another, e.g.?) So getting something back could happen before the act of doing something for this person as well as after which I would count as selfish.

PhilX

[duszek]

Is God selfish ?

He created man and woman and the whole world and told himself: this is good.

[duszek]

If all relationships are selfish in a way can we find any examples of altruism at all ?

Or is the concept of altruism meaningless ?

[Philosophy Explorer]

Is God selfish ?

He created man and woman and the whole world and told himself: this is good.

I would say yes as the Bible says He created man in His own image.

I would suggest it's a great topic for the Philosophy of Religion section to continue.

PhilX