Never regret, Never apologise.

[Hobbes' Choice]

Smart people, who are mindful and aware never have to apologise. Get out of that Christian blame/shame culture, there ain't no god to punish you, so grow up.

Apologies.

When the shit hits the fan and something goes wrong apologies are empty. They can only be a response to two things: 1) an admission of guilt, or 2) an admission of a lack of maturity.
I can think of no thing, which I have done that would ever deserve an apology. Were I to apologise for something I'd be admitting that I intended to do wrong. Well I have reached an age that if I intend to do wrong, then I damn well mean it, if not then the thing I am being asked to apologise for was an unintended consequence of an act I did NOT intend. Well If I did not intend it, then why would I want to apologise. How would an apology help? What is the function of an apology? Apologies are for children. They make them reflect on unwise action; they make them feel small and vulnerable in order that the child will reflect and change his ways. For an adult, no apology ought ever to be necessary. When things happen I EXPLAIN, I never apologise.

Regret.

Regrets are much the same as guilt trips that require apologies. Things can go wrong and you make mistakes. But a "mistake" is by nature unintended. When you screw up, and if you are mature, you have acted in the best possible way given your circumstances. No one intends to screw-up. If you do then why regret your decisions? At any given moment you pays your money and you makes your choice. Why would you want to regret a choice that YOU made? If you don't like it: reflect, learn., move on! Regret is an empty emotion that serves no purpose but self indulgence. I've known people who have regretted something for decades. WHY? Do Something about it! But stop bleating. Take control of your present. Move on. TO regret, is to regret who you are. You made the choice - live with it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFtGfyruroU

[Melchior]

Smart people, who are mindful and aware never have to apologise. Get out of that Christian blame/shame culture, there ain't no god to punish you, so grow up.

Apologies.

When the shit hits the fan and something goes wrong apologies are empty. They can only be a response to two things: 1) an admission of guilt, or 2) an admission of a lack of maturity.
I can think of no thing, which I have done that would ever deserve an apology. Were I to apologise for something I'd be admitting that I intended to do wrong. Well I have reached an age that if I intend to do wrong, then I damn well mean it, if not then the thing I am being asked to apologise for was an unintended consequence of an act I did NOT intend. Well If I did not intend it, then why would I want to apologise. How would an apology help? What is the function of an apology? Apologies are for children. They make them reflect on unwise action; they make them feel small and vulnerable in order that the child will reflect and change his ways. For an adult, no apology ought ever to be necessary. When things happen I EXPLAIN, I never apologise.

Regret.

Regrets are much the same as guilt trips that require apologies. Things can go wrong and you make mistakes. But a "mistake" is by nature unintended. When you screw up, and if you are mature, you have acted in the best possible way given your circumstances. No one intends to screw-up. If you do then why regret your decisions? At any given moment you pays your money and you makes your choice. Why would you want to regret a choice that YOU made? If you don't like it: reflect, learn., move on! Regret is an empty emotion that serves no purpose but self indulgence. I've known people who have regretted something for decades. WHY? Do Something about it! But stop bleating. Take control of your present. Move on. TO regret, is to regret who you are. You made the choice - live with it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFtGfyruroU

I agree. I am adopting this attitude more and more. Apologies are for weaklings.

[Harbal]

I'm really sorry about this, Hobbes', but I'm regretting reading your post.

[SpheresOfBalance]

Total self stroking BS!

[vegetariantaxidermy]

That's called arrogance, which is a weakness in itself. There's nothing wrong with a bit of humility. We all do or say things to hurt others that we later regret.

[artisticsolution]

Hi Hobbes, I have to agree with everyone ...except I don't think you are being arrogant. Funny stuff Harbal! LOL

Here's a woman's point of view...lol...I believe your ass will be in the dog house if you bring this weak shit into a relationship with your woman. We women have a tendency to be unpredictable if you haven't noticed, so you never know when we are going to feel we deserve an apology. I pity the man who doesn't take heed. (shudders at the thought)

[Hobbes' Choice]

I'm really sorry about this, Hobbes', but I'm regretting reading your post.

Ho Ho. It was your choice.
Learn from your mistakes, move on. DOn't compound the error by replying to a post you don't like. You might end up reading something you will regret for the rest of your life.

[Hobbes' Choice]

I agree. I am adopting this attitude more and more. Apologies are for weaklings.

I think people deserve an explanation, if only for them to know you don't have it in for them, or to know that you actually did it on purpose.

[Hobbes' Choice]

That's called arrogance, which is a weakness in itself. There's nothing wrong with a bit of humility. We all do or say things to hurt others that we later regret.

I think you need to apologise for who you are, given that post. How dare you try to include "we all". Have the balls to speak for yourself and not for others.

Yes we say stuff that hurts, if you are an inconsiderate emotional twat. If you do, you need to EXPLAIN what you meant and have the balls to stick to what you think is true. They deserve the honesty not the idiotic backtracking and self humiliation. How can they respect you for that?

[Harbal]

DOn't compound the error by replying to a post you don't like. .

Compounding my errors constitutes the story of my life, I'm afraid.

[vegetariantaxidermy]

That's called arrogance, which is a weakness in itself. There's nothing wrong with a bit of humility. We all do or say things to hurt others that we later regret.

I think you need to apologise for who you are, given that post. How dare you try to include "we all". Have the balls to speak for yourself and not for others.

Yes we say stuff that hurts, if you are an inconsiderate emotional twat. If you do, you need to EXPLAIN what you meant and have the balls to stick to what you think is true. They deserve the honesty not the idiotic backtracking and self humiliation. How can they respect you for that?

I take it you aren't married.

[Hobbes' Choice]

DOn't compound the error by replying to a post you don't like. .

Compounding my errors constitutes the story of my life, I'm afraid.

Oh well.

[Hobbes' Choice]

That's called arrogance, which is a weakness in itself. There's nothing wrong with a bit of humility. We all do or say things to hurt others that we later regret.

I think you need to apologise for who you are, given that post. How dare you try to include "we all". Have the balls to speak for yourself and not for others.

Yes we say stuff that hurts, if you are an inconsiderate emotional twat. If you do, you need to EXPLAIN what you meant and have the balls to stick to what you think is true. They deserve the honesty not the idiotic backtracking and self humiliation. How can they respect you for that?

I take it you aren't married.

I'm always happy to explain what happened and my reasons. She is more than happy that nothing I do has ever intended to hurt her, and thus deserves no apology.

[artisticsolution]

I'm always happy to explain what happened and my reasons. She is more than happy that nothing I do has ever intended to hurt her, and thus deserves no apology.

Yeah, but Hobbes, I don't think there are many people out there who really intend to harm... Life just gets in the way. The desire to fulfill ones own needs sometimes supercedes the needs of others. Although harm was not intended, full filling ones desires at the expense of others, even though unintentional, harms another.

My husband likes to read the newspaper, there are always little black finger prints on the white doors and molding that I have to look at and subsequtly clean. I don't like to clean, but I also don't like to look at black finger prints. He doesn't know that this harms me...albeit in a little way. My point is, life happens. It is nice to acknowledge, maybe once in a while , that one is a little sorry for the inconvenience.

[Hobbes' Choice]

I'm always happy to explain what happened and my reasons. She is more than happy that nothing I do has ever intended to hurt her, and thus deserves no apology.

Yeah, but Hobbes, I don't think there are many people out there who really intend to harm... Life just gets in the way. The desire to fulfill ones own needs sometimes supercedes the needs of others. Although harm was not intended, full filling ones desires at the expense of others, even though unintentional, harms another.

My husband likes to read the newspaper, there are always little black finger prints on the white doors and molding that I have to look at and subsequtly clean. I don't like to clean, but I also don't like to look at black finger prints. He doesn't know that this harms me...albeit in a little way. My point is, life happens. It is nice to acknowledge, maybe once in a while , that one is a little sorry for the inconvenience.

My reaction to this is that you might need to get a life? The fact that you are obsessed with small fingerprints is yours to own. There is nothing necessary or natural about this phobia.

If you point out this thing to your husband he will react in a way that is commensurate with his character. He might be more aware of the "problem" you have with his behaviour, or he might think that you are some sort of compulsive obsessive cleaner. He might suggest that you learn to live with a little more disorder, or he might wear gloves.
But there is no right way about this. You either accept him for who he is, or leave him. He might be willing to change for you, he might not. But you could just as easily try to change to accommodate him.

I do not see any case for an apology in this scenario.