Philosophy Now Forum

Although this topic is directly about “Straight” people, other adult human relationships, like same sex couples, or bisexual couples, or even couples who are Asexual are welcome to be discussed here as well.

How do we navigate success or failure in adult male and female relationships ?

What are your personal opinions, as to what you believe or think, make an adult male and female relationship, either work really well, or fail miserably? Apart from the obviousness of incompatibility. Why do some relationships work and others do not?

Should we try harder to make them work, or simply give up on them far too easily, for fear of being mentally and emotionally drained, or hurt.

Are relationships just too much effort. Are they not worth the bother. Is the juice never worth the squeeze. Is it just easier to say they are wrong, or they are broken, even when they have also felt amazing for a long time, but then due to mood changes, suddenly something feels so wrong, so it’s just easier to throw them out with the trash, rather than try to fix the broken. Should we be frightened of each others moods, or allow moods to be there, without them posing any threat to the wonderful opportunist potential that two people can create together with each other. Can we accept that nothing is ever just a given, and that nothing is ever easy, and that with enough effort and relentless dedication all things and differences can be worked out.

Isn’t a treasured flower vase, that unfortunately crashed and broke into many pieces, but was restored back to its former beauty by being glued back together just as sentimental and precious as it once were in it’s original pristine state? And can’t our relationships be treated like that?


Or is it just better to be alone, for the rest of your life.



Discuss.

Since there's no such thing as men or women any more your question is obsolete.

accelafine wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 10:16 am Since there's no such thing as men or women any more your question is obsolete.

Ok.

What about presences then?

Are presences worth pursuing?

Under normal circumstances, men primarily love women and women primarily love children. As it should be, but this means that the idea of romantic relationships is maybe the #1 lie of humanity.

Atla wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 10:23 am Under normal circumstances, men primarily love women and women primarily love children. As it should be, but this means that the idea of romantic relationships is maybe the #1 lie of humanity.

Does that include ''transwomen''? I mean, they are REAL WOMEN after all, or are you 'transphobic'? Hmm?

Would a man walk over hot coals for this lovely lady?

accelafine wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 10:36 am Would a man walk over hot coals for this lovely lady?






roxy tickle.jpg

Omg.. I've never seen someone so feminine..

Hi Fairy,

Great question my friend.

There is such a huge volume that can be said on this matter........like a million rabbit holes one can go down.

I'll see if I can toss a larger more general net as a reply.

I believe it all boils down to why we are here in the 1st place. Here, meaning, here on earth.

We are male or female, or 1 or the other "feeling" like you should be the other, etc.... all for a deeper reason that goes back to why you are here in the 1st place. To learn and grow.

The relationships, marriage is equally a learning experience. The better you are in picking the right spouse, the better your life is. But maybe you (the deeper you) picked a particular spouse for there are things you need to learn from that person. Yes, a deeper reason.

A riding friend of mine recently made a comment about having constant issues with his wife. Then said, he guesses all relationships are like that. I said, mine is not. He paused and nothing more was said.

Are we better to be alone? Again, there is such a variation in that matter. There are like no absolutes, I would say. In general, I'd say no. We are meant to socialize. Have a spouse, etc... Studies even showed that married men live longer than single men.

Yes, your posting Fairy is a good one. It opens the door for a good discussion so kudos to you.

We need to see the bigger picture to understand the smaller more segmented parts.

Mark

Never trust someone who calls you 'friend' when you don't know from a bar of soap.

Trying to narrow or 'put' parts of the group human beings into sub-groups like "men" and/or "women" will never work, properly and Correctly, and as such 'seeing' you human beings as such or as anything else is just 'an illusion', as you would say "fairy".

Age wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 12:31 pm Trying to narrow or 'put' parts of the group human beings into sub-groups like "men" and/or "women" will never work, properly and Correctly, and as such 'seeing' you human beings as such or as anything else is just 'an illusion', as you would say "fairy".

The illusion I’ve previously mentioned has always been in reference to the artificial sense of separation. The separation is illusory that’s all. The illusion still exists though, insofar as the illusion is felt as real. There are real people out there Age, unless one would rather change the concept “people” to “illusion”

In the dream of separation, that’s the only place where the illusory characters live and have their being, albeit illusory, and that does not negate their character as not existing, no, they exist as their concept known.

Hello Age, or would Age rather I greeted Age with …hello illusion

accelafine wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 12:08 pm Never trust someone who calls you 'friend' when you don't know from a bar of soap.

Trust is a tricky word. It’s true we cannot know anyone else. But we can know ourself, if we are totally honest. We may not always show parts of ourselves to others in fear of them rejecting us, but deep down, aren’t we all the same human presence, with all the same hidden baggage and maybe demons.


As a human presence, who wouldn’t say no to a cuddle or some loving affection and some positive vibes from others.
And also, every best friend or intimate lover you have ever known, once started out as a complete stranger. So being closed off to others in fear of totally distrusting them, is a self inflicted isolation, that you either enjoy, or repel. I would rather remain open to potential and possibilities because we’re all the same human presences, underneath all our egoic pretensions.

Fairy wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 10:14 am Discuss.

A long term relationship will reveal that the self-cherishing of one is the cause of all problems for two.

Walker wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 4:34 pm

Fairy wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 10:14 am Discuss.

A long term relationship will reveal that the self-cherishing of one is the cause of all problems for two.

Wow, what a coincidence. I totally agree with that.

I was actually thinking the exact same thing after some deep pondering, not long after I’d created this thread topic.

Thanks for your contribution.

BuzzCap7 wrote: ↑Sat Sep 07, 2024 11:59 am Hi Fairy,

Great question my friend.

There is such a huge volume that can be said on this matter........like a million rabbit holes one can go down.

I'll see if I can toss a larger more general net as a reply.

I believe it all boils down to why we are here in the 1st place. Here, meaning, here on earth.

We are male or female, or 1 or the other "feeling" like you should be the other, etc.... all for a deeper reason that goes back to why you are here in the 1st place. To learn and grow.

The relationships, marriage is equally a learning experience. The better you are in picking the right spouse, the better your life is. But maybe you (the deeper you) picked a particular spouse for there are things you need to learn from that person. Yes, a deeper reason.

A riding friend of mine recently made a comment about having constant issues with his wife. Then said, he guesses all relationships are like that. I said, mine is not. He paused and nothing more was said.

Are we better to be alone? Again, there is such a variation in that matter. There are like no absolutes, I would say. In general, I'd say no. We are meant to socialize. Have a spouse, etc... Studies even showed that married men live longer than single men.

Yes, your posting Fairy is a good one. It opens the door for a good discussion so kudos to you.

We need to see the bigger picture to understand the smaller more segmented parts.

Mark

Thanks Mark for your participation here.

I love the way you express your world views and share your ideas and opinions with us, and thanks for the compliments regarding the thread topic. I personally think relationships never end, they simply complete. As if yes, there is something to learn from each other. And then one simply moves on with their particular souls growth.