Philosophy Now Forum

Why choose to be miserable? Who likes to be miserable? Nobody. Then why do many people choose misery in their lives?

If we analyze the cause of misery, it is essentially a result of unfulfilled expectations. Therefore, the moment you have expectations, you can be sure there will be misery because all expectations cannot be fulfilled. Therefore, when we create desires and expectations, along with those desires and expectations, we have already planted a seed of misery, which will sprout one day. Is that what we are seeking? If we do not want misery, then what should we do? Ancient scriptures advise that if we do not want misery, then we should not plant the seed of misery, which is bound to sprout one day and give troubles and sorrows that everyone dreads. Instead,if one lives with detachment and renunciation, can there be misery?

So what happens when one is detached or ‘desireless’? One has no expectations. When there is no expectation, there is no unfulfilled expectation because there is no expectation. Therefore, if one accepts everything that comes as a gift from God, as a shower of rain that comes from above, one will never be unhappy; one will never be miserable.

So, do you want to be miserable? If you don’t want to be miserable, you need to to find out: are you chasing desires? Are you passionate about your expectations? Are you seeking with greed things that are beyond your reach? If you are, then misery is not far away. But if you don’t want to be miserable then do you know what you must do? Stop planting the seeds of misery today.

AiR

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I really like your thread.


GREAT subject matter & well presented.


I don't know?...why wouldn't you receive any responses to this original thread?


What if you re-made this topic in a different vein? Ask the reader for their opinion? Give a personal experience that relates to this?


Don't know but...I like your style myself.




...as a afterthought, could you make this more philosophical? Like - We Reach For Happiness But Are Always Foiled...?






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Bill Wiltrack wrote:.





I really like your thread.


GREAT subject matter & well presented.


I don't know?...why wouldn't you receive any responses to this original thread?


What if you re-made this topic in a different vein? Ask the reader for their opinion? Give a personal experience that relates to this?


Don't know but...I like your style myself.




...as a afterthought, could you make this more philosophical? Like - We Reach For Happiness But Are Always Foiled...?






.

I noticed you occasionally comment on how you like someone else's thread, and then question why others do not respond.

Why do you not respond yourself, by answering some of the questions posed?

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I don't know. Good point.


I guess I initially overlook the thread or touch upon it initially and, like others, I'm not inspired to respond.









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AiR wrote:Why choose to be miserable? Who likes to be miserable? Nobody. Then why do many people choose misery in their lives?

If we analyze the cause of misery, it is essentially a result of unfulfilled expectations. Therefore, the moment you have expectations, you can be sure there will be misery because all expectations cannot be fulfilled. Therefore, when we create desires and expectations, along with those desires and expectations, we have already planted a seed of misery, which will sprout one day. Is that what we are seeking? If we do not want misery, then what should we do? Ancient scriptures advise that if we do not want misery, then we should not plant the seed of misery, which is bound to sprout one day and give troubles and sorrows that everyone dreads. Instead,if one lives with detachment and renunciation, can there be misery?

So what happens when one is detached or ‘desireless’? One has no expectations. When there is no expectation, there is no unfulfilled expectation because there is no expectation. Therefore, if one accepts everything that comes as a gift from God, as a shower of rain that comes from above, one will never be unhappy; one will never be miserable.

So, do you want to be miserable? If you don’t want to be miserable, you need to to find out: are you chasing desires? Are you passionate about your expectations? Are you seeking with greed things that are beyond your reach? If you are, then misery is not far away. But if you don’t want to be miserable then do you know what you must do? Stop planting the seeds of misery today.

AiR

You are taking the 'ascetic' position. You are welcome to deny things but it is more difficult if you've already sampled things. The one's I know, for instance, who take this view more often than not simply have a 'fortune' of lacking such experiences sufficient to give them a desire for them.

If you really want to lack such expectations, then death is the best place for that. What's the worth of life if you simply minimize the experience? Technically, you could 'live' on full life supports without requiring the burden of having to be conscious too. In fact, our conscious experience IS simply the evolution of a mechanism used to SEEK the environment for input nutrients and to avoid death. And the way this is done is to provide a motivational set of programs that assign 'values', such as pleasures to SEEK and pains to AVOID.

So I think this ascetic type of thinking works for some but is naive to expect it to work for MOST.

AIR wrote:
If we analyze the cause of misery it is essentially a result of unfulfilled expectations. Therefore the moment you have expectations you can be sure there will be misery because all expectations cannot be fulfilled. Therefore when we create desires and expectations along with those desires and expectations we have already planted a seed of misery which will sprout one day. Is that what we are seeking? If we do not want misery then what should we do? Ancient scriptures advise that if we do not want misery then we should not plant the seed of misery which is bound to sprout one day and give troubles and sorrows that everyone dreads. Instead if one lives with detachment and renunciation can there be misery?

In Buddhism all cravings are the cause of misery in the form of psychological suffering. Even when they are fulfilled they can
still inadvertently lead to suffering by perpetrating more craving. Minimising or eliminating them therefore reduces suffering

AiR wrote:Then why do many people choose misery in their lives?

AiR wrote:Why choose to be miserable? Who likes to be miserable? Nobody. Then why do many people choose misery in their lives?

A good question that you could answer yourself. Why do you choose to be miserable?

If and when you answer that from a truly open and honest reflection, then you could discover and learn why ALL people choose misery in their lives also.

AiR wrote:If we analyze the cause of misery, it is essentially a result of unfulfilled expectations. Therefore, the moment you have expectations, you can be sure there will be misery because all expectations cannot be fulfilled.

But if and when you have the right expectation/s, then ALL of them can be fulfilled. Misery will diminish to then be non-existent.

AiR wrote: Therefore, when we create desires and expectations, along with those desires and expectations, we have already planted a seed of misery, which will sprout one day. Is that what we are seeking?

ALL of us, human beings, start out seeking the exact same thing/s, right?

AiR wrote: If we do not want misery, then what should we do?

Easy. Stop expecting things that can not be fulfilled.

AiR wrote: Ancient scriptures advise that if we do not want misery, then we should not plant the seed of misery, which is bound to sprout one day and give troubles and sorrows that everyone dreads. Instead,if one lives with detachment and renunciation, can there be misery?

That would depend on what one is to detach or renounce them self from.

AiR wrote:So what happens when one is detached or ‘desireless’? One has no expectations. When there is no expectation, there is no unfulfilled expectation because there is no expectation. Therefore, if one accepts everything that comes as a gift from God, as a shower of rain that comes from above, one will never be unhappy; one will never be miserable.

Obviously if one is always getting everything that they truly want or seek, then that one would never be miserable.

AiR wrote:So, do you want to be miserable?

No. Do you?

AiR wrote: If you don’t want to be miserable, you need to to find out: are you chasing desires?

Of course, as a human being, 'i' am chasing desires. 'i' have been since i can remember. And, when I look at any new born human baby I can see they are also chasing the exact same desires.

AiR wrote:Are you passionate about your expectations?

Depending on your definition of passionate, would not every human being be somewhat passionate about their expectations? Would not being completely passionless about one's expectation sort of defeat the purpose of having any expectation.

AiR wrote: Are you seeking with greed things that are beyond your reach?

No. Are you?

AiR wrote: If you are, then misery is not far away. But if you don’t want to be miserable then do you know what you must do? Stop planting the seeds of misery today.

AiR

When did you, and how did you, stop planting the seeds of misery, if that is what you have done?

If what all human beings seek and desire is the exact same thing/s, and these sought after and desired things are instilled in us at birth or earlier, then how do you propose human beings stop planting the seeds of misery today? If there are innate things desired and expected, which have already been planted, and they are not received nor reached, then how do you propose human beings could just stop being miserable?

TSBU wrote:

AiR wrote:Then why do many people choose misery in their lives?

People choose misery in their life because they are ignorant of the effect of the cause. For instance, if I know that this dish of mushroom will lead to food poisoning and I still eat it, then it is my ignorance about the effect of the cause that makes me indulge in the cause.

AiR

ken wrote: When did you, and how did you, stop planting the seeds of misery, if that is what you have done?

When I realized that desires, cravings, and expectations are causing unhappiness, it made me stop planting the seeds. I realized that instead of focusing on greed, let me stop at my need. Let me not use the achievement model but use the contentment model to be happy.

AiR

And you think that everybody is like you, that, like you, they can't be happy with their goals. And you stay quiet, no suffering... and no happiness, you just eat and write things in a forum while you get older, because that's "all you need".