Philosophy Now Forum

SpheresOfBalance wrote:Actually, It's falling in lust at first sight, as most sex therapists agree that the initial attraction between human male and female is purely sexual in nature. After the two start talking there is a chance that this 'crazy little thing called love,' can actually spark.

Hah! Disagree!

I once fell in love with a woman and had to make big effort to manage to get sexually aroused by her.

It was really weird, I had all those stuff in my body, you know: arousal, but it wasn't sexual, my dick simply disobeyed at the command of orgasm and rising, instead I just wanted to talk to her, to ask her stuff, philosophize with her (she had said she was gonna be a philosopher among things). I know it was falling in love, my body knew it, but it didn't want to have sex with her, only of course, if it was possible to have sex with her brainz alone* ^^

So no, the therapists may think such stuff to be normal, but at least there is one young quite sexually active (albeit sexually alone) person who experienced falling in love long before it was even possible to get sexual attraction into the scene, and it actually never came either (and I didn't get her, either).

* without the involvement of unnecessary parts of the body like the penis, anus, tongue for anything else than talking non-dirty etc.

The Voice of Time wrote:

SpheresOfBalance wrote:Actually, It's falling in lust at first sight, as most sex therapists agree that the initial attraction between human male and female is purely sexual in nature. After the two start talking there is a chance that this 'crazy little thing called love,' can actually spark.

Hah! Disagree!

I once fell in love with a woman and had to make big effort to manage to get sexually aroused by her.

It was really weird, I had all those stuff in my body, you know: arousal, but it wasn't sexual, my dick simply disobeyed at the command of orgasm and rising, instead I just wanted to talk to her, to ask her stuff, philosophize with her (she had said she was gonna be a philosopher among things). I know it was falling in love, my body knew it, but it didn't want to have sex with her, only of course, if it was possible to have sex with her brainz alone* ^^

So no, the therapists may think such stuff to be normal, but at least there is one young quite sexually active (albeit sexually alone) person who experienced falling in love long before it was even possible to get sexual attraction into the scene, and it actually never came either (and I didn't get her, either).

* without the involvement of unnecessary parts of the body like the penis, anus, tongue for anything else than talking non-dirty etc.

Are you saying that, initially, you did not find that she was: pretty, beautiful, attractive? Keep in mind, I'm talking about when your eyes first met!

SpheresOfBalance wrote: Are you saying that, initially, you did not find that she was: pretty, beautiful, attractive? Keep in mind, I'm talking about when your eyes first met!

yes indeed. She was not attractive out of the ordinary.

The Voice of Time wrote:

SpheresOfBalance wrote: Are you saying that, initially, you did not find that she was: pretty, beautiful, attractive? Keep in mind, I'm talking about when your eyes first met!

yes indeed. She was not attractive out of the ordinary.

OK then, what was it that, when your eyes first met, made you want more of her? What did you love, seeing as how you knew absolutely nothing about her; in that first glimpse how/what/why did you "love" (of) her?

The beauty of the soul and of the spirit ?

I often feel attracted Platonically to men and would like very much to have a lifelong relationship with them, like with brothers.

This is the more stable kind of love, which the Greeks called "philia".

A woman can love a gay man in this way and enjoy sweet harmony with him.

duszek wrote:The beauty of the soul and of the spirit ?

I often feel attracted Platonically to men and would like very much to have a lifelong relationship with them, like with brothers.

This is the more stable kind of love, which the Greeks called "philia".

A woman can love a gay man in this way and enjoy sweet harmony with him.

Many young men feel like this, then they get real and come out.

duszek wrote:The beauty of the soul and of the spirit ?

I often feel attracted Platonically to men and would like very much to have a lifelong relationship with them, like with brothers.

This is the more stable kind of love, which the Greeks called "philia".
Your talking about the after thought, I'm referring to the very initial animal response. I think you're just trying to be politically correct. I'm talking about biological necessity.

A woman can love a gay man in this way and enjoy sweet harmony with him.

So you have special eyes that can see soul and spirit, huh? I want a pair of those, to see the invisible, that would be nice.

In addition duszek, your feeding him ideas. I wanted his unbiased response.

Actually looks and all this other stuff has nothing to do with it. It's innate for man and woman to seek a mate for procreation, and this has everything to do with sex. You may tell yourself otherwise, but water, (or juices as they are), seeks it's own level!

SpheresOfBalance wrote:

duszek wrote:The beauty of the soul and of the spirit ?

I often feel attracted Platonically to men and would like very much to have a lifelong relationship with them, like with brothers.

This is the more stable kind of love, which the Greeks called "philia".

A woman can love a gay man in this way and enjoy sweet harmony with him.

So you have special eyes that can see soul and spirit, huh? I want a pair of those, to see the invisible, that would be nice.

In addition duszek, your feeding him ideas. I wanted his unbiased response.

Actually looks and all this other stuff has nothing to do with it. It's innate for man and woman to seek a mate for procreation, and this has everything to do with sex. You may tell yourself otherwise, but water, (or juices as they are), seeks it's own level!

Men as all other animals do not seek out a mate with a purpose of procreation.
Only humans can even demonstrate the knowledge that sex and birth are linked, and most men have little interest in that during the chase.

chaz wyman wrote:

SpheresOfBalance wrote:

duszek wrote:The beauty of the soul and of the spirit ?

I often feel attracted Platonically to men and would like very much to have a lifelong relationship with them, like with brothers.

This is the more stable kind of love, which the Greeks called "philia".

A woman can love a gay man in this way and enjoy sweet harmony with him.

So you have special eyes that can see soul and spirit, huh? I want a pair of those, to see the invisible, that would be nice.

In addition duszek, your feeding him ideas. I wanted his unbiased response.

Actually looks and all this other stuff has nothing to do with it. It's innate for man and woman to seek a mate for procreation, and this has everything to do with sex. You may tell yourself otherwise, but water, (or juices as they are), seeks it's own level!

Men as all other animals do not seek out a mate with a purpose of procreation.
Only humans can even demonstrate the knowledge that sex and birth are linked, and most men have little interest in that during the chase.

Again I see that you're talking of mindfulness, I'm referring to the fundamental biological nature of the organism and mans sex hormone, testosterone.

Here you go:

"Sexual attraction is attraction on the basis of sexual desire or the quality of arousing such interest. Sexual attractiveness or sex appeal refers to an individual's ability to attract the sexual or erotic interest of another person, and is a factor in sexual selection or mate choice. The attraction can be to the physical or other qualities or traits of a person, or to such qualities in the context in which they appear. The attraction may be to a person's looks or movements or to their voice or smell, besides other factors. The attraction may be enhanced by a person's adornments, clothing, perfume, hair style, and anything else which can attract the sexual interest of another person. It can also be influenced by individual genetic, psychological, or cultural factors, or to other, more amorphous qualities of the person. Sexual attraction is also a response to another person that depends on a combination of the person possessing the traits and also on the criteria of the person who is attracted."

--Wikipedia--

I personally concur, that it is in fact, biological.

SpheresOfBalance wrote:Here you go:

"Sexual attraction is attraction on the basis of sexual desire or the quality of arousing such interest. Sexual attractiveness or sex appeal refers to an individual's ability to attract the sexual or erotic interest of another person, and is a factor in sexual selection or mate choice. The attraction can be to the physical or other qualities or traits of a person, or to such qualities in the context in which they appear. The attraction may be to a person's looks or movements or to their voice or smell, besides other factors. The attraction may be enhanced by a person's adornments, clothing, perfume, hair style, and anything else which can attract the sexual interest of another person. It can also be influenced by individual genetic, psychological, or cultural factors, or to other, more amorphous qualities of the person. Sexual attraction is also a response to another person that depends on a combination of the person possessing the traits and also on the criteria of the person who is attracted."

--Wikipedia--

I personally concur, that it is in fact, biological.

No animal has the intention of parenthood. They are motivated by the drive to fuck.
There is no animal for which it is most true that sex is used NOT for procreation but for the act itself.
In humans sex is not largely practiced with the intention of having a child. I cannot begin to estimate how many times I have had sex. In fact I had sex 30 minutes ago, but hey I only have one child, and do not want to have another.
So what are you really saying. Sex has not got much to do with reproduction.
Would you say you had more or less children than the the number of times you have had sex??

Sex is largely a social construct, and includes many practices that has no biological consequences.

SpheresOfBalance wrote:

chaz wyman wrote:

SpheresOfBalance wrote: So you have special eyes that can see soul and spirit, huh? I want a pair of those, to see the invisible, that would be nice.

In addition duszek, your feeding him ideas. I wanted his unbiased response.

Actually looks and all this other stuff has nothing to do with it. It's innate for man and woman to seek a mate for procreation, and this has everything to do with sex. You may tell yourself otherwise, but water, (or juices as they are), seeks it's own level!

Men as all other animals do not seek out a mate with a purpose of procreation.
Only humans can even demonstrate the knowledge that sex and birth are linked, and most men have little interest in that during the chase.

Again I see that you're talking of mindfulness, I'm referring to the fundamental biological nature of the organism and mans sex hormone, testosterone.

If food were primarily biological then why do the culinary arts exist?
Understanding eating as nourishment says absolutely nothing about this complex social practice.

chaz wyman wrote:

SpheresOfBalance wrote:

chaz wyman wrote:Men as all other animals do not seek out a mate with a purpose of procreation.
Only humans can even demonstrate the knowledge that sex and birth are linked, and most men have little interest in that during the chase.

Again I see that you're talking of mindfulness, I'm referring to the fundamental biological nature of the organism and mans sex hormone, testosterone.

If food were primarily biological then why do the culinary arts exist?
Understanding eating as nourishment says absolutely nothing about this complex social practice.

But this is after the biological fact. Your food analogy is like asking why they have love dolls, dildos, KY Jelly and pocket pussies. It's irrelevant, It's after the fact. We're talking about a spontaneous response, an overwhelming urge, this is "love at first sight" The dildo/KY jelly smorgasbord and such may come later, but it has absolutely nothing to do with Love at first sight.

As to Love at first sight: "Basis in psychology: Research has shown two bases for love at first sight. The first is that the attractiveness of a person can be very quickly determined, with the average time in one study being 0.13 seconds."

--Wikipedia--

Now see "Sexual Attraction" three posts up. And sexual attraction is about procreation whether we're mindful of it or not, it is innate in the organism. We're talking about the spark (or at least I am), not how we talk about it as an afterthought.

Finally, but I originally thought this too obvious, there would be no male or female, if it weren't for the fact of the organism's need to procreate.

"The first fossilized evidence of sexually reproducing organisms is from eukaryotes of the Stenian period, about 1 to 1.2 billion years ago."
and
"Evolutionary thought proposes several explanations for why sexual reproduction developed out of former asexual reproduction."
--Wikipedia--

"Love is an emotion of a strong affection and personal attachment. Love is also a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion, and affection; and "the unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another" Love may also be described as actions towards others or oneself based on compassion, or as actions towards others based on affection."
--Wikipedia--
Does it sound like any of the above can happen in .13 sec's without knowing someone?

Edit's: additional info

Hah! Disagree!

I once fell in love with a woman and had to make big effort to manage to get sexually aroused by her.

It was really weird, I had all those stuff in my body, you know: arousal, but it wasn't sexual, my dick simply disobeyed at the command of orgasm and rising, instead I just wanted to talk to her, to ask her stuff, philosophize with her (she had said she was gonna be a philosopher among things). I know it was falling in love, my body knew it, but it didn't want to have sex with her, only of course, if it was possible to have sex with her brainz alone* ^^

So no, the therapists may think such stuff to be normal, but at least there is one young quite sexually active (albeit sexually alone) person who experienced falling in love long before it was even possible to get sexual attraction into the scene, and it actually never came either (and I didn't get her, either).

* without the involvement of unnecessary parts of the body like the penis, anus, tongue for anything else than talking non-dirty etc.



I know exactly what you mean.

If it was possible to have sex with his brains alone... LOL isnt there something called Platonic Love, if there is this was it. Yet, this still doesnt fit what I felt, as the sexual attraction was there, but neither of us could consumate it. I loved this guy for 20 years, being very young we thought sex should a part of it, but we both were more stimulated intellectually. We even spent a week in Paris together. Ha. The bond deepened but not physically. (I didnt get him either).

I would call it "Recognition". I can't elaborate more than that, it is still a puzzle to me.

reasonemotion wrote:Hah! Disagree!

I once fell in love with a woman and had to make big effort to manage to get sexually aroused by her.

It was really weird, I had all those stuff in my body, you know: arousal, but it wasn't sexual, my dick simply disobeyed at the command of orgasm and rising, instead I just wanted to talk to her, to ask her stuff, philosophize with her (she had said she was gonna be a philosopher among things). I know it was falling in love, my body knew it, but it didn't want to have sex with her, only of course, if it was possible to have sex with her brainz alone* ^^

So no, the therapists may think such stuff to be normal, but at least there is one young quite sexually active (albeit sexually alone) person who experienced falling in love long before it was even possible to get sexual attraction into the scene, and it actually never came either (and I didn't get her, either).

* without the involvement of unnecessary parts of the body like the penis, anus, tongue for anything else than talking non-dirty etc.



I know exactly what you mean.

If it was possible to have sex with his brains alone... LOL isnt there something called Platonic Love, if there is this was it. I loved this guy for 20 years, being very young we thought sex should a part of it, but we both were more stimulated intellectually. We even spent a week in Paris together. Ha. The bond deepened but not physically. (I didnt get him either).

I would call it "Recognition". I can't elaborate more than that, it is still a puzzle to me.

"In short, with genuine platonic love, the beautiful or lovely other person inspires the mind and the soul and directs one's attention to spiritual things."
--Wikipedia--

I think you'd really be stretching it if you said that this could apply in .13 seconds.

We're not talking about Platonic love, I thought the topic was "Love at First Sight," which is almost instantaneous.