Philosophy Now Forum

I was recently attacked by someone I live with, which caused a deterioration of my emotional state. I spoke to the samaritans who, after I had explained my situation, referred me to NHS direct who, after I had explained my situation, referred me to the A&E where, after I had explained my situation to the triage nurse, I was referred to the crisis team who I then explained my situation to. While I was waiting for them to get me a cup of tea, I penned the following.

Solemn Soliloquys
Express Expositions
Rotating Repetitively
Eavesdropped by Physicians
Where grasping minds
grasp little on the grander
scale grandiloquently
expressed expressly for
their ears leading
to frustration;
eventually tears.

[Express and expressly are intended to have double-meanings]

Some Systems Suck
in mysterious ways
to release thoughts
tea best served
cold ?

I wonder if after all the delays and at least 4 explanations of your situation, the initial incident seemed less 'hot' ?
I've found when having to relay accounts of incidents/concerns over the phone etc, the objective facts have less impact (ie can sound stoopid to others )....compared to the felt feelings. There is a mismatch.

So, the Samaritans can't direct you directly to the Crisis Team ? How do they assess level of risk, the need for speed ?

Sorry to hear of your experience, Psychonaut, hope all is resolved ?
Best wishes
M.

Can´t you move out ?
Statistically, you are most likely to be murdered by your husband or wife. Or some other family member.

My idea of the ideal life is an appartment building with about 10 or 15 appartments. The neighbours who like each other at a particular time have tea together, those who like to be left alone can pretend not to be there or put a plate on the door: Leave me alone.

It could be that many people need enough space for their aura.

Hi mhoraine

I wonder if after all the delays and at least 4 explanations of your situation, the initial incident seemed less 'hot' ?

Less 'hot' perhaps, but no less pressing and disturbing. I still felt trapped and that the landscape of my world had changed such that there was nowhere truly comfortable. I nearly became homeless.

I wasn't too bothered for having explained my situation that number of times, the first and the last were truly beneficial. Sometimes it is good to talk, to get things off your chest. By expressing them to someone else there is at least some feeling that you aren't facing it alone; even if the support that the person can offer is very limited.

The Samaritans are not allowed to offer any advice, and nor do they provide proper counselling, but instead something called 'active listening'. The purpose is to help the person know simply that they are being understood and, where appropriate, provide particular help which they may request (such as referral to another agency). I had trained with the Samaritans in the past, and knew full well how limited their help was, but there was nowhere else to turn that I knew of as I had no idea such a thing as the crisis team existed.

The crisis team, while able to offer more specific support was still very limited. I cannot help but feel that the NHS should institute a policy of therapeutic hugs. "Here is your prescription sir, take 5 a day not lasting more than 2 minutes each".

I've found when having to relay accounts of incidents/concerns over the phone etc, the objective facts have less impact (ie can sound stoopid to others )....compared to the felt feelings. There is a mismatch.

I generally find this to be true, but the other day this wasn't so much a concern of mine. My mind was thinking little of what others might think of what I was saying, instead it was focused purely on the discharge. Speaking to the person face-to-face in the end was grand, she was very understanding of my situation. Although at first she, and the triage nurse, were suspicious that I was off my skull on some form of drugs. Personally I found this amusing, but I am sure that some vulnerable people may find this hostile.

"Are you on drugs?"
"No"
"Your eyes seem red, let me see your eyes"
"Sure look at them all you like; I've been crying"

So, the Samaritans can't direct you directly to the Crisis Team ? How do they assess level of risk, the need for speed ?

The Samaritans do not refer unless they are asked to make a referall.

Their service is deliberately incredibly limited, in order to ensure that it is a 'safe space' for those with suicidal thoughts where they know they will not be judged or patronised or instructed; a Samaritan is not even allowed to advise against suicide and will, at times, be on one end of the phone while on the other a person is killing themself.

Sorry to hear of your experience, Psychonaut, hope all is resolved ?

Far from it. But, I am on the road to recovery.

Hi duszek.

Can´t you move out ?

My parents will not let me move in with them, even temporarily. They've seen my arse out the door and don't want to see its return. I've no one else that I feel I could impose on.

Until my tenancy runs out I cannot claim Housing Benefit for living anywhere else, and there is still the matter of moving there. My other flatmate is currently away until Sunday. When he returns we will be exploring in depth our options.

Statistically, you are most likely to be murdered by your husband or wife. Or some other family member.

Hopefully it won't come to murder..

My idea of the ideal life is an appartment building with about 10 or 15 appartments. The neighbours who like each other at a particular time have tea together, those who like to be left alone can pretend not to be there or put a plate on the door: Leave me alone.

It could be that many people need enough space for their aura.

I heartilly recommend Bertrand Russell's book In Praise of Idleness. It is not, as one may think, some poetic languishing ode to doing nothing. Instead it is an acute examination of how society is not structured for the benefit of people and how it might better be structured, including a detailed proposition for the form of housing and communities in which we should live.

Not everyone can read all good books that are there.
Please, share with the class all that you remember from Russell´s book.
In a nutshell.

I, for example, have read Prof. Irvine´s book "On desire". I can tell you what´s it about and why I am so convinced by his ideas.

Your parents are tough.
But only recently you mentioned that your mother did not respect your privacy and entered your room without knocking or without waiting after knocking on the door. So I thought you still lived with your mother.

Not everyone can read all good books that are there.
Please, share with the class all that you remember from Russell´s book.
In a nutshell.

In terms of his specific plan for housing all I can remember is that it involved a communal creché.

His general thesis was that the purpose of increasing the productivity of workers should not be to lay off the unnecessary ones in order to increase profits for the owners, but should instead be to reduce the hours of the working week in order to afford workers more leisure time to spend as they wish, hopefully on bettering themselves as well as on pleasure.

I will try and dig out the book at some point and summarise the housing plan, but all of my books are stacked away in a draw so this is difficult.

Your parents are tough.
But only recently you mentioned that your mother did not respect your privacy and entered your room without knocking or without waiting after knocking on the door. So I thought you still lived with your mother.

I was harking back to earlier times. I think that part of the reason they don't want me back is because I 'cause' arguments by taking issue with perfectly innocuous actions like the invasion of my privacy.

Architecture and Social Questions

This is an incomplete preview of the relevant chapter.

It seems I cannot find my copy of the book, as it is most likely one which I have lent out but not received back.

Page 34 is where he begins his proposal, and I doubt it could be condensed further for summary.

I do not suggest that it is a good solution, merely interesting for having been a proposed solution.

Attempts have been made at such socially minded architecture, usually resulting in failure. Peculiarly these failures are treated as proof that experimentation itself is flawed, rather than the particular experiments themselves.

Interestingly some of Russell's suggestions seem prosaic and mundane; precisely because they have since been succesfully incorporated into society. He was writing in 1935.

Psychonaut wrote:
Less 'hot' perhaps, but no less pressing and disturbing. I still felt trapped and that the landscape of my world had changed such that there was nowhere truly comfortable. I nearly became homeless.

I wasn't too bothered for having explained my situation that number of times, the first and the last were truly beneficial. Sometimes it is good to talk, to get things off your chest. By expressing them to someone else there is at least some feeling that you aren't facing it alone; even if the support that the person can offer is very limited.

The Samaritans are not allowed to offer any advice, and nor do they provide proper counselling, but instead something called 'active listening'. The purpose is to help the person know simply that they are being understood and, where appropriate, provide particular help which they may request (such as referral to another agency). I had trained with the Samaritans in the past, and knew full well how limited their help was, but there was nowhere else to turn that I knew of as I had no idea such a thing as the crisis team existed.

The crisis team, while able to offer more specific support was still very limited. I cannot help but feel that the NHS should institute a policy of therapeutic hugs. "Here is your prescription sir, take 5 a day not lasting more than 2 minutes each".


I generally find this to be true, but the other day this wasn't so much a concern of mine. My mind was thinking little of what others might think of what I was saying, instead it was focused purely on the discharge. Speaking to the person face-to-face in the end was grand, she was very understanding of my situation. Although at first she, and the triage nurse, were suspicious that I was off my skull on some form of drugs. Personally I found this amusing, but I am sure that some vulnerable people may find this hostile.

"Are you on drugs?"
"No"
"Your eyes seem red, let me see your eyes"
"Sure look at them all you like; I've been crying"

I'm so sorry to hear of your situation. As having foreseen the storm, deciding to bring it to fruition and then begging for it to stop, I can certainly attest to the difficulties thereof. However my young friend I can certainly say that these are the defining moments that show us who we truly are. The moment I realized that the storm itself was a beauty to behold and that once I allowed the wind to blow, thunder to crash, and rain to fall the process is quite liberating despite the pain involved. In my profession, all be it of a medical nature, there are days that I must say I give more literal and figurative hugs than medications. So although I realize I am a stranger, I am a paid professional A philosophical and supportive hug I send to you on your journey, as it is what it is, not good, not bad, just is.

I'm so sorry to hear of your situation.

Thankyou Eliza.

However my young friend I can certainly say that these are the defining moments that show us who we truly are.

I agree, as I said to someone recently, it feels like the flames have burnt away all the crap and left the glowing hot iron frame of self (though the heat was damn near enough to melt it).

The moment I realized that the storm itself was a beauty to behold and that once I allowed the wind to blow, thunder to crash, and rain to fall the process is quite liberating despite the pain involved.

Again I agree, and to quote myself again ( ), its a storm of monkeys all a-flingin' their poo; remember to take an umbrella.

In my profession, all be it of a medical nature, there are days that I must say I give more literal and figurative hugs than medications. So although I realize I am a stranger, I am a paid professional

Stranger, paid professional, it doesn't matter what you are in these regards, you are a person with kind words

A philosophical and supportive hug I send to you on your journey, as it is what it is, not good, not bad, just is.

A pleasant sufficiency

Again, thankyou for your sympathy.

Yesterday I wrote a new poem, it was written for a person who just happened to be here during this horrible week, but it applies equally to you good people

When four walls come closing in
And beasts of men cause a din
Lonely seems the road traversed
As all fortunes seem reversed

From men leap demons in every face
Back and forth as we pace
And just some simple decency
Can be enough to set us free

Remind us of the wider scope
Instill in us a shred of hope
Stop us from always drawing blanks
and give us something
for which to say
Thanks.

Kindness, sympathy or just knowing that someone likes us can be a matter of life and death in this cold world.
I remember an Italian friend who had to go to Italy because her ex-boyfriend needed the presence of someone who liked him. Conversations on the phone were not enough.
He felt particularly bad after his father lost their (father´s and son´s) money while gambling on some shares.

Psychonaut wrote: Yesterday I wrote a new poem, it was written for a person who just happened to be here during this horrible week, but it applies equally to you good people

When four walls come closing in
And beasts of men cause a din
Lonely seems the road traversed
As all fortunes seem reversed

From men leap demons in every face
Back and forth as we pace
And just some simple decency
Can be enough to set us free

Remind us of the wider scope
Instill in us a shred of hope
Stop us from always drawing blanks
and give us something
for which to say
Thanks.

My pleasure. I am glad to hear that you had the inspiration for this poem. Lifelines at times of feeling cast at sea, to me, have been so very important. As it is Monday have other options surfaced?

duszek wrote:Kindness, sympathy or just knowing that someone likes us can be a matter of life and death in this cold world.
I remember an Italian friend who had to go to Italy because her ex-boyfriend needed the presence of someone who liked him. Conversations on the phone were not enough.
He felt particularly bad after his father lost their (father´s and son´s) money while gambling on some shares.

I tend to agree with this statement. Although obviously exceptions apply, I wonder if those whom chose isolation do so, because of fear rather than desire. In addition I understand the need for physical closeness as opposed to just a voice. I may not have a firm grasp on things, but energy itself, however its manifestation, seems to be the contributing factor to such a need.

My pleasure. I am glad to hear that you had the inspiration for this poem.

I got two new poems out of this whole thing, so, you know, every cloud...

Lifelines at times of feeling cast at sea, to me, have been so very important.

Unless what you want is to be swept away then they will be.

As it is Monday have other options surfaced?

The situation is still ridiculous, but my own house is in order such that I can move forward.

does a plant try to understand itself?
does a reed try to understand itself?
does a song try to understand itself?
does a story try to understand itself?
does a building try to understand itself?

when the plant the reed the song the story and the building did not know, could they fight against whatever made them grow?

why do i always see icicles drip and melt but never fall
then one did
now a pool of water
and is gone

'Wonder'

Eager electric currents spark through grey abyss
Fizzing micro fibres, exciting nerves as they persist
Jolting ever so swiftly between atomic twine
Dashing through synapses where they abruptly reassign

Kaleidoscopic flashing lights ascend as their own ends decline
A spark of reason then ignites within an otherwise dormant mind
Such flares of energy take flight in exasperated proliferation
An elating course which then recurs and so creates deliberation